


In An Unlocked Place

by Lapin



Category: Avatar: Legend of Korra
Genre: Brother-Sister Relationships, Gen, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2012-08-14
Updated: 2012-08-14
Packaged: 2017-11-12 03:58:47
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,613
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/486443
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Lapin/pseuds/Lapin
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Iroh has always had a special relationship with his oldest sister. She watches over him as he grows up, until he falls in love. And then, comes the hardest part: letting go.</p>
            </blockquote>





	In An Unlocked Place

**Author's Note:**

> A/N ...My younger sister had a baby. I'm having _feelings_ right now, okay? About siblings. Don't you judge me.
> 
> Disclaimer: Avatar: Legend of Korra is owned by Nickelodeon Studios, and I express no affiliation with them, nor do I profit in any way from the use. The title is from the Ellie Goulding song "Lights", off the 2010 album of the same name.

Ursa is seven years old when her brother Iroh is born. He ends up being the last, for many reasons that she's too young to know, so it's a good thing she's already seven, and old enough to understand what the creature her mother's handmaid has placed in her arms really is. 

Well, of course she knew what a baby was before, had cooed over them in fascination, but now she's old enough, and experienced enough, to know exactly what a brother _is_. 

Iroh, for his part, sleeps, his skin still red and wrinkly, a patch of fine black hair misting over the top of his head, and black eyelashes that stick together in clumps. She hasn't seen his eyes yet, but she knows they're golden. Everyone in the royal family has golden eyes. That's just the way things are.

Her mother is very tired, her handmaiden says to her, as the healers move quickly in and out of the room. She's very tired, and Ursa must stay out. No one else is there, because Iroh wasn't supposed to be born yet. His birthday was supposed to be after the Dragon Festival, she remembers, and that is very lucky. But the Dragon Festival isn't for three more weeks. 

Iroh is very small, in her arms.

She sits with him for a long time, rocking him when he fusses, like she does her dolls. Everyone seems very confused and frightened, and she thinks they've been forgotten in all the fuss. But Ursa is very smart, her grandfather says, and very mature for her age. So she sits quietly, in her playroom, out of the way, and holds Iroh. 

He begins to squirm, and become uncomfortable, at one point, and she thinks he must be hungry. So she very dutifully walks down to the kitchens and commands the cook to bring her a bottle. She isn't sure what real babies drink, but the cook is, and they are not used to disobeying Ursa. No one even attempts to take Iroh, as they give her what she needs. Iroh takes it naturally, and drinks until he is full. Then she burps him, like the wetnurse did with Lu Ten, wraps him back up, and goes back to her playroom. 

The kitchen staff sends a young dishwasher who can be spared, a teenage girl who already has a baby of her own, and she sits with Ursa for the rest of the day. She does not speak to her, of course, unless Ursa speaks to her, but Ursa has little time for her. Iroh is tired, but he likes when she walks while holding him, so she does, though he is heavy, and her arms ache. When he finally falls back asleep, she lays him down on the biggest floor cushion in the room, on his back, and curls around him, so she can feel if he moves, if he needs her.

The dishwasher sits quietly with them, until someone more important finally remembers them. 

Ursa never knows how close she came to being Fire Lord at the age of seven. 

This is Iroh's first day of life.

-

Ursa has four younger siblings, but Iroh is her favorite. Part of this is vanity, because Iroh adores her more than anyone else, even their mother. Being loved is a heady thing, and at thirteen, Ursa is not immune to it. 

The bigger part is that she simply loves Iroh best. 

He follows her around as much as possible, at five years old, despite numerous attempts throughout the years to lure him away. Ursa doesn't like that though, and she is the crown princess. If she wants her baby brother with her, he will be with her. No one says no to Ursa. 

Like Ursa, Iroh is an oddly quiet child. The other three royal children are loud, boisterous creatures, and considered completely normal. But Ursa and Iroh prefer to live in their own worlds. Ursa can sit and study her histories, her literature, her social graces, and Iroh will sit in the corner, not too far from from her, never too far, playing with his toys. He likes to create whole worlds with his toys, wars fought between his ships and tanks. 

A new tutor comes, around when Iroh turns six. Ursa is fourteen now, but still very small. Her grandfather tells her with a kind of sad affection that she looks just like his younger sister. She worries that it means she will never get any bigger. Already, her two younger sisters are taller. Her grandfather tells her it means she looks like one of the most talented firebenders who ever lived. That lessens the sting.

The new tutor is a tall man with hard eyes, and she does not like him. He tries to tell her that Iroh cannot play in her school room anymore, that he must stay in the garden. She can still see him, but the tutor says that she must focus on her lessons, and he is not here to babysit. 

Her mother takes the tutor's side, and Iroh is exiled to the garden. He doesn't mind terribly much, as long as he can still see her, and she relaxes when he proves capable of caring for himself without her hovering. 

The tutor teaches her things no one has ever taught her. He is not here to educate her on her dead relatives, or long-finished wars, or how to pour tea. He is here to teach her how to be a princess, how to conduct herself like both a politician and a threat. She comes to enjoy the lessons, 

When Iroh turns seven, their cousins come to visit. Ursa has never liked any of them, and they prove why within a day. They invade the private garden where Iroh plays while she studies, and though her tutor tries to keep her focused, when they throw Iroh's favorite toy ship into the middle of the pond, she has had enough.

Her cousins waver between respect for their crown princess, and contempt for their bossy cousin, as they look at her. Iroh does not cling to her, or anything so unbecoming, but he stands beside her with a more defiant look than he dared have before. 

She raises an eyebrow when they say nothing. With obvious reluctance, they bow their heads, and murmur a proper greeting, all without her saying one word. 

“The Boiling Rock is considered fit punishment for causing harm to a member of the royal family.” She says, calmly, as though she's educating them. “Do you know, grandfather is the only one who ever managed to infiltrate and lead an escape from there.” She tips her head to the side. “Perhaps the skill runs in the family.” 

She doesn't need to say anything else. One of them hitches his shirt up, and wades out to retrieve the toy, handing it to Iroh with a much more proper bow. They leave without speaking.

When she rejoins her tutor, Iroh now happily playing again, he looks up at her with an almost approving smile. “Councilman Sokka and Suki helped your grandfather escape, your highness.”

And that is the end of his protests against Iroh.

-

Iroh is twelve years old when he is sent away to the military academy. He leaves as her shadow, and she misses him like she can't believe. He misses her too, to judge from his letters, and after three months, she can't take it anymore.

He meets her at the docks, and when he rushes forward to embrace her, it's with a sorrow she barely understands as she realizes he's now taller than her. He almost picks her up in his enthusiasm, as he smiles brightly, chattering about all he's learning here.

The grounds are not as awful as she expected, but they lack the beauty of the palace. Everything here has purpose, nothing meant only for beauty. A shame, because Iroh dearly loves beautiful things. 

Iroh introduces her to no one but his teachers, and no one speaks to him. They keep their eyes down, only respectfully acknowledging her as the crown princess, and Iroh as their prince. There is no friendliness, no companionship. 

His teachers tell her that Iroh is talented, and it's with genuine wonder that they show her his work. _Genius_ , they tell her. He understands concepts that graduating students still struggle with. He is a prodigy. 

As though she doesn't know he's special.

But he's lonely too, without any friends here. No one knows how to talk to a prince, and though Iroh is likeable, bright and happy, they're reluctant to approach, do or say the wrong thing.

So, with his best interests at heart, she shoves him into the pool. 

Her brother surfaces, coughing up water, as the students around them hover on the verge of laughter. “Ursa, that wasn't very nice,” He sputters, as he climbs out. 

“Sometimes I'm not nice.” She reminds him, and, his good manners pushed aside in little brother annoyance, he picks her up and tosses her right in, just like she thought he would. He laughs gleefully at her, and when she kicks him in the shins, finally, _finally_ , the other students laugh. 

His letters after that are much happier, and she breathes easier. 

-

When Iroh turns fourteen, he graduates, the earliest graduate in the history of the Academy, and he begins his military career with their mother's tired blessing.

Ursa can't sleep, and she finally collapses in anxious tears when the moon is high in the sky. She cries until the sun comes up, her stomach aching and her throat raw. 

She goes to the ceremony with dry eyes and smiles.

-

When the word reaches them that the fleet has been wrecked in Yue Harbor, and that her brother was last seen falling overboard, badly injured, she finds herself in the old playroom for the first time in years. It hasn't changed, kept the same for the other grandchildren, or visiting families' children.

The floor cushion is still there.

She pulls it out, and curls up on it, and is unsurprised to find she still can. She never did get very big. 

The space between her knees and chest was where Iroh spent his first day of life, her watching over him, and she thinks about how he trusted her from the very beginning to keep him safe from the world. He slept without fear, because he knew Ursa was there. 

She breaks down, and sobs until she has no more tears left, and even then, she still spasms with dry ones, each one painful, but nothing like the gaping hole ripping through her chest, the space where Iroh was and no longer is. It hurts, and hurts, and hurts, and won't stop.

In her dreams, she tries to find him, but he is always just out of reach, slipping around a corner.

She wakes to her grandfather shaking her, his own tears dried on his face.

“Ursa,” He gasps. “Ursa, he's _alive_ ,” 

She thought she had no tears left. 

She is wrong, as she cries into her grandfather's shoulder.

-

Her brother brings him to her with a smile that scares her. It's afraid, and hopeful, and happy. “Ursa,” He says, as the young man steps in behind him. “There's someone I want you to meet.”

His name is Bolin, and he makes Iroh laugh more in that first meeting than she can ever remember him doing before. He's cheerful, and funny, and smarter than she expected from a pro-bender. Most importantly, her brother worships him.

He's an early riser like her, surprisingly, and she finds him in the garden.

“Iroh used to play here, when he was a child. While I was getting my lessons.” She says, handing him a cup of coffee. Her and Iroh are the weird ones in the family, preferring the stronger drink over tea, and she's not surprised when Bolin takes it gladly. 

“I knew there had to be some, somewhere.” He smiles at her. “I didn't know that, about Iroh. I just thought it looked nice. He did say there was a turtle duck pond he played by.” 

“They fly east, this time of year.” She says, drinking her coffee. “Iroh liked to pretend they were corrupted spirits, and he would fight them back with his ships.” 

Bolin laughs, and she does too, just a little. “He still does stuff like that, when he's bored. Only he uses Pabu and the tea set.” Now she really laughs. “Pabu is my fire ferret. He likes it, really, but it made me think Iroh was crazy for awhile there, especially considering how we met.” 

He tells her in detail about the battle of Yue Bay, how her idiot little brother detonated a bomb with his firebending, how he controlled his fall through the force of the fire, and his rescue by Avatar Aang's statue. She listens with bated breath, nerves on end, and she knows her brother is safe in his bedroom, but she wants to find him and hold him to her the way she did when he was small. 

He keeps talking, tells her more about the insane things her brother has done, and he tells it all with pride, but a touch of fear too. She knows the feeling behind it well.

Iroh finds them like that, bearing a tray of breakfast like the good little brother he is, and more coffee. He cringes in embarrassment as Ursa now tells Bolin her stories, about all the silly things he's done over the years, until Bolin is falling over in laughter, and Iroh is covering his face in good-natured shame. 

“Were you there for everything?” Bolin finally asks, after they've been brought lunch. 

“It certainly feels like it.” Iroh complained, nudging at her with his foot. “I told you, I followed her around like a shadow.” He rolls his eyes at his younger self. “Father says I cried when they tried to take me away from her, when I was a toddler.” 

“You did. I took care of you.” She muses, and she almost reaches out for him, right as he stretches out, and puts his head in Bolin's lap. The other man gives him a slice of apple, and as they talk, he falls asleep. 

“Great, now I'm stuck like this.” Bolin huffs. “He always does this. My brother was like 'Now you have someone to take care of you, Bo', but seriously, _I'm_ doing all the work here. You know, he didn't even know how to cook! What grown adult can't cook?” Even as he ranted, he stroked Iroh's head, like she had done so many years ago. 

“A prince,” She reminds him, as she smiles. It's the end of something, she thinks, as they keep talking. He doesn't need her to take care of him anymore, probably hasn't for awhile. “And if you think he's helpless, wait until you meet the others.” 

He blanches. “I've heard stories.” He looks down at Iroh fondly, then back up at her. “Hey, you like me, right? It's a really big deal to him that you like me. So I want you to.” His fingers were still raking through her brother's hair, soft and caring. 

“Yes, I like you.” She assures him, and he relaxes, laughs.

It's the end of something, she thinks. But one ending is another beginning, and if this is the end of her time spent as the person who loves Iroh most, it's also the beginning of learning to love her new brother as much as she loves the old. 

It's not as hard it seems.

**Author's Note:**

> A/N I have a nephew and I feel old and oh my god too much stuff.


End file.
